a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
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