I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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