remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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