She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
My legs feel like baby dolphins
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
