Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
