he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Randomize
