Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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