Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Randomize
