i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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