on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
