we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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