Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Damn victory sex feels great
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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