i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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