I puked a lego.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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