Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
