She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Help. Why am I so naked?
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