State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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