have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
she woke up with a sticky ear
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
