dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
