there's paper in my vomit.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
