bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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