That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
she woke up with a sticky ear
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Dicks are not precious.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
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