So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
