i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
