why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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