I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
