im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Randomize
