i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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