hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Randomize
