And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
