I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
