i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
