Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Ketchup is God's man juice
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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