i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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