Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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