"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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