She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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