**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
My vagina is very pro this idea
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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