At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize
