they need to just BURY HIM!
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
