erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
