I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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