Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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