Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
