Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
