the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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