on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
How does one acquire holy water?
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
