Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
her vagine was all disorganized.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Randomize
