How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
