In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
My penis needs a shock collar
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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