I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
